05 Jan Approaching Thirty
I was on tiktok sometime on the first day of 2023 and I came across this sound saying, “once I was 20 years old, …soon will be 30 thirty years old. I went on ahead to create my own video with the sound, the views aren’t bad. That’s not important though, what is really amazing is that, what everyone says about approaching or reaching thirty is true. It was like an acute attack of realization. Every part of me is alert, my senses are alert, my thoughts are alert, even my heart is super alert. Focus and perspective about life changes and am only thinking of being rich, finding the love of my life, have beautiful kids and living a fabulous life.
The intensity of finding a man of my life is unreal, for me it’s like there was a closed door in my mind and it’s just opened wide, it’s overwhelming. I can tell you for sure a huge amount of my time currently is thinking about men. Suddenly I can’t think of anything else, when am not on my personal goals, it’s this man, that man! I want a line of high value men at my door, it’s not too much to ask, is it?
I feel wiser, like I have accumulated a huge amount of knowledge in the recent past, I feel like am someone younger girls can look up to. I feel closer to God. I know myself better and I have come to love myself so much I can’t think of comparing myself to another person. I am more confident than before, and certainly more Beautiful, one could say that am aging like fine wine, maybe this self love has gone to my head, but it’s absolutely beautiful and freeing.
I will tell you this, if some of my college mates were to meet me today they wouldn’t recognize me for a while considering how shy and awkward I was in college. Now, each day has become a daily lesson for me and a chance to improve myself however much small the step. It’s not a bragging post, it’s one to encourage someone who feel like they are in a cocoon, that sooner or later, they will sprout, better they be on the look out for something to trigger them to start working on themselves.
Am not good at making friends, not one to meet a stranger on my own and start making acquaintances. But, in company of a friend, or colleagues or maybe at a function with common grounds, it has become much easier with time, am no longer labelled the quiet girl in the corner with her phone. I find myself interacting, engaging in conversations, laughing out loud, dancing to music, which I couldn’t do in my early twenties, I think growing up is a blessing, it’s freedom, never be afraid to approach thirty.
Then again one might say, it’s still too early in the year and maybe it hasn’t hit me up yet and am speaking too early, but these are the kinds of thoughts I don’t want to entertain, I want to enjoy this beautiful phase and thrive.
Growing up has shown me the importance of gratitude, of everything available in my life, of my life, my health, the food I eat and the clothes I wear, the house I live in, people in my life and my surroundings. When I look up to the sky and it’s blue, I feel beauty around me, when I see a sunset, I feel hopeful, when the night sky is full of stars and the moon is shining bright, I feel connected to the world, closer to my dreams, I feel love; Looking out my rooftop and seeing all the bright lights it’s like pure romance. The cool breeze out of my balcony calms my mind and gives me peace. Everything and everyone connects me to the universe and I have come to appreciate how all of it is vital to my inner joy, and prosperity; I know for a fact I wouldn’t be where I am without all the people in my life who affect me in different ways.
It’s scary as hell as well, viewing how wide the world is, seeing how little percentage of it is mine, thinking of all my untouched potential and not knowing how to unload it, seeing my goals so far away without certainty if I will reach them, being alone not really sure if I will find my man, wondering if I became a mother, would I be good at it? I have multiple fears and often they try to surface and derange my positivity, sometimes they bring me down to tears. Lucky for me I read and learnt about the secret, that of having a positive thoughts, of having a mindset of abundance, while trusting God. That’s how I fight my giant fears.
Am hopeful just as people say that at thirty is where you prosper, is when you achieve your goals, it’s when you at your best version, the most productive, then if those are the facts, it’s only fair I get all that. Let universe take note that my time has come, my time for Abundance in love, peace, wealth and prosperity in all aspects of my life. I know I will face problems, not many I hope, soft life goals in my mind but, it cannot be a full life without few hiccups.
Am not married but I will happily be, I have not my reached my richness target but I will be prosperous, am an aunt to many beautiful babies, soon I will have my own beautiful babies, and I will be an outstanding woman, this is how am approaching 30.